Hello

I had never really considered blogging before now. Who would want to read about my laments, challenges, and concerns regarding my boys, both recently diagnosed with ASDs?  But then...I thought I would. I mean, if I weren't me and I needed something to laugh about, cry over, to help me see I wasn't alone.  Because this does feel lonely, even with a great circle of friends, if your kids are the only ones screaming, spinning, or flapping and you're the only mom obsessing over which pants your five year old will agree to wear.

Yep,as a mom of spectrum kids, I find myself  in sticky situations (a.k.a. "pickles"- both sour and sweet) all the time. Play dates can be gruesome, parents of "typical" children gawk in disbelief and fear, and everybody from cashiers to great uncles twice removed has an opinion that is only sometimes marginally helpful. I get yelled at, pushed, and hit by the very children I am trying to help, nurture, and soothe.  And although I know better, I sometimes feel like a failure.

But then, somewhere between PTO meetings and IEP reviews, after TSS time and physical therapy, something wonderful happens every day. Small things, tiny, really. The kind of stuff parents with typical kids take for granted. My 5-year old will accept a change in plans or tolerate a spot of bubble solution on his shirt.  My 7 year old will play with a classmate for a few minutes more than the week before or he'll apologize for something he said because he finally understands why it's rude. And for a moment, life is blessedly ordinary.  

But the truth is that it's not. It's extra-ordinary.  My boys smile every day despite knowing, deep down, they are different. And they fight against it in countless ways every day. So, I fight too. And in addition to feeling frustrated, tired, and overwhelmed, I'm proud and inspired... every day.